Lost and Found: a schemer in close quarters

As I've mentioned in the previous post, I am in that period of the month when the female body rebels against its owner. Subsequently, I dwell in self-pity and pain and have cases of insomnia. But last night the burdens of Mother Nature proved to be useful. I present to you...in pure sherlockian style..."The case of the disappearing hamster"


The perpetrator of the extraordinary deed is a small-dark-fur-scoundrel of a hamster. Her name (for it is a she) is Eva. An adorable little creature but wild at heart and a passionate predisposition ( which in Victorian mentality is nothing less nothing more then criminal for a female to be). Thus her whole boring existence (it is indeed boring to be a hamster) is devoted to the fine art of chewing bars.


The action in question began at about 1. P.M After ending my nightly routine of cleansing I returned to my room in order to toss and turn in the comfort of my bed. As I seated myself my gaze wondered towards the resting place of the daemon. And what did my eyes perceive? The little creature was returning my gaze outside her quarters. Thus with a fine leap I was at her side ready to grab and squeeze her little neck, all this while uttering fine words fit for a lady such as myself. But catch what cannot be caught. She slipped through my fingers and after a long struggle I managed to trap her under the upper part of the cage. So with the culprit behind bars I was left to inspect the damages. The superior minds that created the design of the cage inserted a drawer for the purpose of evacuating the bedding. Well my little devil chewed it and pushed so as to create an escape route. Thus she escaped. Escape route 1… for she was not done. I managed to block route nr. 1 and as I lay with a hawk’s gaze upon her I was reworded a little surprise. She managed to break a little peace of horizontal metal bar so as to inset her pout between two vertical one and dislocate the left corner of the cage and slip out. I fought a little with her. The collateral victims of this confrontation were my finger and her nerves for I, after being bit, gave her a finger over the nose. Continuing with the language fitting for a lady I managed to transfer the creature into a round fish bole. Not very comfortable, as my mother cried for her, but it is sufficient enough to keep her enclosed. The solution at hand is to try to salvage the cage and secure it or acquire a new one. For bow the daemon is sleeping like a little angel with an infantile allure in the bowl, next to me. In the end I give you Eva. But beware foolish one, do not gaze in the eye of the beast for thou wilt be mesmerized. Under the guise of sweetness lies the ardent mind of a schemer.


Your humble annoyed servant,
Myself


P.S: Any comments in the form that the hamster is simply the reflection of the owner will be answered with a humph and a humbug.